Managing the Mayhem - November

Negotiating with Reality

November arrived carrying a clipboard. Not a sword. Not a flamethrower. Not a caffeinated raccoon in steampunk goggles. A clipboard.

And on that clipboard was a list of things Reality would like to discuss. Apparently, I have reached the stage of the year where the universe feels I am ready for negotiations. I disagree. Reality disagrees with my disagreement. And so here we are.

The first week of November has been a month of transitions. The Small Bites Short Story Contest officially opened its doors on November 1st, and writers have already begun exploring this year's theme, Things Unsaid. Every year I wonder where the stories will go. Every year they surprise me. Somewhere out there, writers are currently plotting emotional devastation, hidden secrets, lost opportunities, and revelations that should probably come with warning labels. As always, I can't wait to see what arrives.

Meanwhile, we're quietly gearing up for the holiday season at Indies United. The end of the year always arrives much faster than it should. Readers begin searching for gifts, authors start looking ahead to next year's releases, and somewhere along the way everyone collectively realizes that December is practically tomorrow. The publishing world never really slows down, it simply changes costumes and pretends to be festive while continuing to sprint.

Over in Inkrealm, we added something that means a great deal to me personally: a memorial area dedicated to remembering the authors we've lost. It was intended as a place of reflection, remembrance, and connection. A quiet corner in a world built around stories.

And perhaps that's fitting.

Because stories are how we remember. They're how we keep people close. They're how we carry pieces of those we've loved long after they've left the room.

As some of you may know, I recently lost my mother. I'm not going to spend this month's column talking extensively about grief, because honestly, I'm still finding my way through it. Some days feel surprisingly normal. Other days arrive out of nowhere carrying memories I wasn't expecting.

But this is November, a month traditionally associated with gratitude, and when I think about gratitude this year, I find myself thinking less about things and more about people.

I'm thankful for the memories. I'm thankful for the stories. I'm thankful for all the years I had with my mother, my grandparents, friends, family members, and others who have crossed my path and left their fingerprints on my life. Many of them now live on in my memoirs. Others are waiting patiently for me to write their stories someday. As long as those stories remain, a small piece of those people remains too. And I find tremendous comfort in that.

Reality, it turns out, is not always interested in negotiating. Some things happen whether we're ready for them or not. People leave. Plans change. Time moves forward. The holiday season rushes in feeling suspiciously early. The inbox multiplies while nobody is looking. The contest launches. The projects continue. Life continues.

But if there is one thing November keeps reminding me, it's that reality and gratitude can exist in the same space. Life doesn't have to be perfect before we can appreciate it.

The work continues. The books continue. The stories continue.

And thankfully, so do we.

Looking Ahead to December

November is still young, which means there is plenty of time left for surprises, deadlines, unexpected opportunities, and at least three things currently missing from my agenda that will somehow become urgent by next week.

Reality and I are still negotiating the terms. So far, neither side appears willing to compromise. We'll see who wins.

Until then, keep managing your mayhem... or at least pretending you are.

Pretending still counts.

Always.

by Lisa M. Orban